Sweet Marie, please see my answer to your comment as promised. Sorry it took me a little longer to reply than I anticipated. you wrote: Ines, I wish to express my gratitude for sharing this story with us. I would like to ask you a question which has nothing to do with neither yourself or autism. I have been sexually abused by my father and by my elder brother and I have run away from the house. I am now 20 years old. It was so painful that I cannot forget it yet. When I am in a train with a lot of men around, I vomit. I also have nightmares in the middle of the night and I become really scared. Do you know a good treatment? In the psychiatry department in Japan, they only give you medicine and it costs 10,000 yen or more for the counseling in 50 minutes. This because social security is not accepted for this kind of medical consultation. It was impossible to get out of bed for while and I had really strong suicidal thoughts even if I was taking the medicine from my Doctor. Therefore, I have decided to stop taking the medicine prescribed by the Doctor and instead I have started to jog, do yoga and to add supplements such as vitamins and minerals during my meals. I started marine sports because I like the sea very much. I can tell I slowly forget and even if it is not possible to forget, I am happy. I am glad you can reach us what you know. After reading your post about your son, I felt a lot of courage inside of me. I understood that you can overcome anything if you work hard to overcome it. Since I got to know you through this blog and activities, I have feelings of happiness now instead of painful and despaired thoughts. Also I sincerely pray for your activities. love, marie

My dearest Marie, i have been thinking about what to write to you. Sadly, the studies show that at least one out of five boys and one out of four girls will be abused before they reach the age of 18. I know well because 2 of my best friends were sexually abused by their relative. One by her father until she was 12, and my other friend by her Grandfather until she was 8 years old!

They both grew out of the feeling of rage, low self-esteem and disgust and they have attended multiple sessions with a psychologist (and not a psychiatrist). What you need is to talk about what happened to you, what you felt and what you now feel now. It is very important to get everything out of your chest and to move on. I know it is a hard thing to do but it is possible.

Remember the key thing for you is to value yourself and to think that you are a true survivor and not a victim. The emotions, the despair that you have felt at that time and repeatedly have made you an angel,you are my little angel! Someone with extra power on this earth.

Keep talking supplements and vitamins. B vitamins are really important, also fish oil (omega 3). get extra magnesium and calcium to balance your moods. Sleep and eat well.

Try to watch happy movies always, read love stories. Go out out with fun friends and remember me every time you feel sad, I will feel it and send you warm waves of happiness!

The good news in your story is that I can feel that you are already going up and moving forward with your life and I am so glad. remember marie, you are only 20 years old, also you have lots of years ahead of you. yOur tragedy can be a powerful engine for you to create amazing achievements in your life.

I am proud of you!

Love, smiles and tenderness,

ines